R.I.P., motherfucker

breaking news from JMWT headquarters in Austin, TX:

last night, one huge motherf'ing cockroach met his untimely demise in the bedroom of yours truly. his death was marked by a yell of "OMG! you're still here! and you're in my BEDROOM! oh hells naw DIE YOU PIECE OF SHIT DIE!" he met his little roach-ly maker when he fell victim to the cruel surprise of a heavy magazine falling from above. his remains are now entombed in the carpet underneath the comforting embrace of two magazines and five hardback volumes of harry potter, where he will remain until JMWT can pluck up the courage to lift said magazines + heavy volumes of harry potter in order to dispose of his squished carcass.

it must be noted that the country of Canada was valiantly represented in this battle extraordinaire by Toronto representative Paula Major, who is staying chez hotel JMWT and played a critical role when she helped move the dresser out of the way and later stomped around on top of the magazines to ensure that the roach was indeed dead.

kinda gives a whole new meaning to "earning your keep," no?

(confidential to the visitors who will be staying with me this wknd + anyone else that has ever considered visiting me: I promise you that this is not standard practice at hotel JMWT. please don't let this deter you from coming to visit me. I'm a great hostess, I promise! I'll take you jogging on the trail, I'll feed you breakfast tacos, we'll drink margaritas and go for all-you-can-eat-BBQ, okay?)